Weather War 2K5: Doppler This! In a battle that has raged for like, eight rounds of quarterly Arbitron Ratings Cycles, Mike Thompson of Kansas City's WDAF TV4, has lashed out brutally at his former protoge/colleague/co-worker/weather geek/slightly effeminate KSHB-TV Head Weather predictio, Gary Lezak. In this morning's column, Hearne Christopher, Kansas City Star's resident gossip king reported that the war of words had reached an unprecedented level. You could read the story if the freaking KC Star didn't make you pay for it. Rest assured: They's was some fighting words. First they argued about who's more right, more of the time; then they took pot-shots at each other, then Lezak (Or Sleestack, as my wife and I call him) challenged Thompson to some sort of a Meteorological Showdown. Which left me wondering: Just what are they going to do? See who can read the radar screen the fastest? Compete in some strangely sad green-screen weather map click-off? Simply stand on a street corner shouting: "I told you it was gonna be like this?"

Seriously, The War of the One Ring it ain't.

I have lived in Kansas City most of my life and the sad truth is this: In this town, like most of the Midwest, there is no friggin' way to predict the weather. Just the other day it went from sunny and 60 to rainy, 40 and lightning in the space of 30 minutes. Then, back to 60 and sunny.

I say they either shut up or Indian Leg Wrestle -- all oiled up and nude -- right on the air. I predict huge ratings. Oh, and that spring is coming.
  ¶ 4:13 PM