Tug On This
Thursday, January 27, 2005
He-Man Tom Brady Haters Club
I don't hate the game or the playa, just Tom Brady.
I mean every time this guy takes the field he wins. Seriously. The Philadelphia Eagles have no chance in Superbowl 39. Brady's gonna put up his boring average numbers (Something like 200 yards passing and 2 TDs) and his team will win 31-17. Watch for it.
But his complete domination over the NFL is not why I hate Tom Brady. It's part of the reason, sure, but it's just part.
I also hate him for dating really hot chicks and having promiscuous sex whenever he wants it. (With models, and starlets and oh I hate him!)
I also hate him for being a multimillionare.
And for being much, much, much, much, much better-looking than I am. (I'm not gonna be in a Gap ad with Sarah Jessica Parker Broderick very soon.)
Let's face it, he's the Fonz to my Ralph Malph.
And do I want to be Ralph Malph?
No, no I don't.
¶ 10:49 AM 28 comments
I mean every time this guy takes the field he wins. Seriously. The Philadelphia Eagles have no chance in Superbowl 39. Brady's gonna put up his boring average numbers (Something like 200 yards passing and 2 TDs) and his team will win 31-17. Watch for it.
But his complete domination over the NFL is not why I hate Tom Brady. It's part of the reason, sure, but it's just part.
I also hate him for dating really hot chicks and having promiscuous sex whenever he wants it. (With models, and starlets and oh I hate him!)
I also hate him for being a multimillionare.
And for being much, much, much, much, much better-looking than I am. (I'm not gonna be in a Gap ad with Sarah Jessica Parker Broderick very soon.)
Let's face it, he's the Fonz to my Ralph Malph.
And do I want to be Ralph Malph?
No, no I don't.
¶ 10:49 AM 28 comments
Wednesday, January 12, 2005
Still smoldering
Below please find the Tug On This approved reading list. After you have completed them all you will be a better person.
I put an * next to the ones I've read. Print and do the same.
The Dirty Thirty:
The Most Frequently Attacked Books Since 1965
The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain *
Black Like Me by John Howard Griffin
Brave New World by Aldous Huxley *
The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger *
Deliverance by James Dickey
The Diary of a Young Girl by Anne Frank *
The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test by Tom Wolfe *
A Farewell to Arms by Ernest Hemingway
Go Ask Alice by Anonymous
The Good Earth by Pearl S. Buck
The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck *
A Hero Ain’t Nothing But a Sandwich by Alice Childress
If Beale Street Could Talk by James A. Baldwin
I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou *
Johnny Got His Gun by Dalton Trumbo *
The Learning Tree by Gordon Parks *
Lord of the Flies by William Gerald Golding *
Love Story by Erich W. Segal
Manchild in the Promised Land by Claude Brown
My Darling, My Hamburger by Paul Zindel
Nineteen Eighty-Four by George Orwell *
Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck *
One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich by Alexander Solzhenitsyn
One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest by Ken Kesey *
Ordinary People by Judith Guest *
Our Bodies, Ourselves by Boston’s Women’s Health Book Collective
The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne *
A Separate Peace by John Knowles *
Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut *
To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee *
¶ 11:19 AM 1 comments
I put an * next to the ones I've read. Print and do the same.
The Dirty Thirty:
The Most Frequently Attacked Books Since 1965
The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain *
Black Like Me by John Howard Griffin
Brave New World by Aldous Huxley *
The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger *
Deliverance by James Dickey
The Diary of a Young Girl by Anne Frank *
The Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test by Tom Wolfe *
A Farewell to Arms by Ernest Hemingway
Go Ask Alice by Anonymous
The Good Earth by Pearl S. Buck
The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck *
A Hero Ain’t Nothing But a Sandwich by Alice Childress
If Beale Street Could Talk by James A. Baldwin
I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou *
Johnny Got His Gun by Dalton Trumbo *
The Learning Tree by Gordon Parks *
Lord of the Flies by William Gerald Golding *
Love Story by Erich W. Segal
Manchild in the Promised Land by Claude Brown
My Darling, My Hamburger by Paul Zindel
Nineteen Eighty-Four by George Orwell *
Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck *
One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich by Alexander Solzhenitsyn
One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest by Ken Kesey *
Ordinary People by Judith Guest *
Our Bodies, Ourselves by Boston’s Women’s Health Book Collective
The Scarlet Letter by Nathaniel Hawthorne *
A Separate Peace by John Knowles *
Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut *
To Kill A Mockingbird by Harper Lee *
¶ 11:19 AM 1 comments
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
Book Burning Burning
Ok. This happens every year when a bunch of idiot, that's right I said IDIOT parents suddenly decide that some of the books their kid's schools are assigning are "bad" or "offensive" or "dirty." Unfortunately, many of these books are also "classics" or "watersheds" or "books that every living person on the planet should be forced to read and discuss."
Here in Kansas City two school distircts in two affluent suburbs -- one on the Kansas side and one on the Missouri side -- are embroiled in book banning piccadiloes right now. Both the Blue Valley and Blue Springs school boards are hearing parents complain about "terrible, offensive" books like Toni Morrison's "Song of Solomon," and Kurt Vonnegut's "Slaughterhouse-Five." During the news story I watched last night about this debacle, I also caught the cover of (drum roll here) "Catcher In The Rye."
I can't believe I didn't see "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer" in there along with "Are You There God? It's Me Margaret" but I'm sure they were both soaking in a bucket of lighter fluid while the cameraman was shooting the B-roll for the story.
Most of the parents I saw were concerned about the language, racism, war and sex in these novels. Unfortunately, they don't seem to be concerned by the things their kids can learn about language, racism, war and sex from reading these books, they only want to make sure they don't read them, and consequently, don't learn.
So ban the books school districts. Don't worry, there are libraries around the world that will still have them. You can also go to Read Print. It's a free online library that hosts full copies of tons of the classics. Thankfully, they are adding more every week.
And, kids, if you still want to read these books your parents are terrified of, you can come on over to my house. By my count I have read and own 20 or so of the most attacked books of all time. You can borrow my copy.
Or better yet, maybe we'll sit in a room and read it together. And after that, we can discuss it. What a novel -- no pun intended -- concept.
Shame on you lazy, idiot parents. Your kids are already learning everything you don't seem to want them to know from MTV. As you ban these books, I sincerely suggest banning the box, as well. As far as McTighe Haüs goes, I've got two boys, one is a toddler, one is an infant. When they grow up, they can read any book they like. If I'm concerned about its content (which I won't be) I will read it with them and we'll talk about it together.
In fact, I may just go out right now and get a couple of copies of "The Catcher In The Rye" and put them on their bookshelves next to "The Cat In The Hat" and the various Thomas The Tank Engine books. Why? Because I, for one, will be offended if my sons DON'T read these books.
To tell Blue Valley to leave the reading list alone visit Blue Valley School District.To tell Blue Springs, visit Blue Springs School District. ¶ 9:27 AM 7 comments
Here in Kansas City two school distircts in two affluent suburbs -- one on the Kansas side and one on the Missouri side -- are embroiled in book banning piccadiloes right now. Both the Blue Valley and Blue Springs school boards are hearing parents complain about "terrible, offensive" books like Toni Morrison's "Song of Solomon," and Kurt Vonnegut's "Slaughterhouse-Five." During the news story I watched last night about this debacle, I also caught the cover of (drum roll here) "Catcher In The Rye."
I can't believe I didn't see "The Adventures of Tom Sawyer" in there along with "Are You There God? It's Me Margaret" but I'm sure they were both soaking in a bucket of lighter fluid while the cameraman was shooting the B-roll for the story.
Most of the parents I saw were concerned about the language, racism, war and sex in these novels. Unfortunately, they don't seem to be concerned by the things their kids can learn about language, racism, war and sex from reading these books, they only want to make sure they don't read them, and consequently, don't learn.
So ban the books school districts. Don't worry, there are libraries around the world that will still have them. You can also go to Read Print. It's a free online library that hosts full copies of tons of the classics. Thankfully, they are adding more every week.
And, kids, if you still want to read these books your parents are terrified of, you can come on over to my house. By my count I have read and own 20 or so of the most attacked books of all time. You can borrow my copy.
Or better yet, maybe we'll sit in a room and read it together. And after that, we can discuss it. What a novel -- no pun intended -- concept.
Shame on you lazy, idiot parents. Your kids are already learning everything you don't seem to want them to know from MTV. As you ban these books, I sincerely suggest banning the box, as well. As far as McTighe Haüs goes, I've got two boys, one is a toddler, one is an infant. When they grow up, they can read any book they like. If I'm concerned about its content (which I won't be) I will read it with them and we'll talk about it together.
In fact, I may just go out right now and get a couple of copies of "The Catcher In The Rye" and put them on their bookshelves next to "The Cat In The Hat" and the various Thomas The Tank Engine books. Why? Because I, for one, will be offended if my sons DON'T read these books.
To tell Blue Valley to leave the reading list alone visit Blue Valley School District.To tell Blue Springs, visit Blue Springs School District. ¶ 9:27 AM 7 comments
Wednesday, January 05, 2005
Daddy and Nick
This is a picture of me and my new son, Nick.
Hold on ladies, he won't be 18 until 2022.
¶ 11:02 AM 1 comments
Hold on ladies, he won't be 18 until 2022.
¶ 11:02 AM 1 comments
Ralph and Warren
In my life right now, there are two records being played incessantly, over and over again. One happens in my car, the other while I'm at work.
The Car:
Because I take my son Sean to school each morning, we listen to his music on my iPod.
Sidebar: If you don't have an iPod you are truly missing out. It will flat change the way you interact with the music you love and will also get you to broaden your horizons to genres, artists etc.
Anyhow, when I was in LA a few weeks ago, I was watching TV when I caught the tail end of a live performance from a band called Ralph's World on one of the morning shows. I immediately dug the instrumentation -- acoustic guitar, bass, keys and a mandolin -- I also enjoyed the fact that the first song they played was a rocker and the second was a country song. Hmmm, I thought.
Then I realized the song was about wanting to be a puppy dog. A puppy dog, a-ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff a puppy dog. Oh, I said to myself, Ralph's World was music for kids that adults won't hate. Interesting.
So I went to ralphsworld.com, ordered the two most recent records and Sean and I been loving them -- loving them -- since Christmas.
Seriously, if you have kids and would like a break from the Thomas the Tank Engine soundtrack, the Wiggles, Disney et al, check out Ralph's World. Plus, for daddies and mommies who play guitar, Ralph conveniently posts the lyrics and chords to all his songs on the site. Sean likes when I play Puppy Dog. (I like it too.) I can't wait until he gets the chords for the new record up there. Sean's fave is "Kid Astro." He calls it the planet song. Listen and you'll hear why.
At Work:
Bottom Line: Warren Haynes is sucking my will to listen to anything other than him or Gov't Mule.
The Mule's most recent record, "Deja Voodoo," is killer jam music and if you like the Dead or Allmans (Warren is also a member) you will love the Mule. They have a great site at mule.net with tons of stuff to learn and hear.
But if you really want to get a taste of what Warren can do, get yourself a copy of "Warren Haynes: Live at Bonaroo." It's avialable everywhere, including iTunes Music store. Man, this is a sweet record. All Warren, all acoustic. He opened one of the days at Bonaroo, and by the time he ended his set with a spectacular "Soulshine" there were around 30,000 people listening to him and his guitar. Also pay close attention to "Patchwork Quilt." If you like jam music, you might be able to figure out who he's singing about.
As Bono once said so eloquently, all you need is "three chords and the truth."
Peace. ¶ 10:35 AM 2 comments
The Car:
Because I take my son Sean to school each morning, we listen to his music on my iPod.
Sidebar: If you don't have an iPod you are truly missing out. It will flat change the way you interact with the music you love and will also get you to broaden your horizons to genres, artists etc.
Anyhow, when I was in LA a few weeks ago, I was watching TV when I caught the tail end of a live performance from a band called Ralph's World on one of the morning shows. I immediately dug the instrumentation -- acoustic guitar, bass, keys and a mandolin -- I also enjoyed the fact that the first song they played was a rocker and the second was a country song. Hmmm, I thought.
Then I realized the song was about wanting to be a puppy dog. A puppy dog, a-ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff a puppy dog. Oh, I said to myself, Ralph's World was music for kids that adults won't hate. Interesting.
So I went to ralphsworld.com, ordered the two most recent records and Sean and I been loving them -- loving them -- since Christmas.
Seriously, if you have kids and would like a break from the Thomas the Tank Engine soundtrack, the Wiggles, Disney et al, check out Ralph's World. Plus, for daddies and mommies who play guitar, Ralph conveniently posts the lyrics and chords to all his songs on the site. Sean likes when I play Puppy Dog. (I like it too.) I can't wait until he gets the chords for the new record up there. Sean's fave is "Kid Astro." He calls it the planet song. Listen and you'll hear why.
At Work:
Bottom Line: Warren Haynes is sucking my will to listen to anything other than him or Gov't Mule.
The Mule's most recent record, "Deja Voodoo," is killer jam music and if you like the Dead or Allmans (Warren is also a member) you will love the Mule. They have a great site at mule.net with tons of stuff to learn and hear.
But if you really want to get a taste of what Warren can do, get yourself a copy of "Warren Haynes: Live at Bonaroo." It's avialable everywhere, including iTunes Music store. Man, this is a sweet record. All Warren, all acoustic. He opened one of the days at Bonaroo, and by the time he ended his set with a spectacular "Soulshine" there were around 30,000 people listening to him and his guitar. Also pay close attention to "Patchwork Quilt." If you like jam music, you might be able to figure out who he's singing about.
As Bono once said so eloquently, all you need is "three chords and the truth."
Peace. ¶ 10:35 AM 2 comments
