He-Man Tom Brady Haters Club
I don't hate the game or the playa, just Tom Brady.
I mean every time this guy takes the field he wins. Seriously. The Philadelphia Eagles have no chance in Superbowl 39. Brady's gonna put up his boring average numbers (Something like 200 yards passing and 2 TDs) and his team will win 31-17. Watch for it.
But his complete domination over the NFL is not why I hate Tom Brady. It's part of the reason, sure, but it's just part.
I also hate him for dating really hot chicks and having promiscuous sex whenever he wants it. (With models, and starlets and oh I hate him!)
I also hate him for being a multimillionare.
And for being much, much, much, much, much better-looking than I am. (I'm not gonna be in a Gap ad with Sarah Jessica Parker Broderick very soon.)
Let's face it, he's the Fonz to my Ralph Malph.
And do I want to be Ralph Malph?
No, no I don't.